Prophets Who Conveniently Receive Divine Encouragement To Screw Kids

Let’s make a list of religious prophets! But only the ones who, having convinced their faithful followers that they spoke the word of God, suddenly received revelations to the effect that God totally wanted them to fuck children or adolescents. I know of three to start with. Let’s have some more, with references!

  • Muhammad, Islam’s Prophet. In sura 33:50, God told the Prophet: “We made lawful for you [several categories of women]. Also, if a believing woman gave herself to the prophet—by forfeiting the dowry—the prophet may marry her without a dowry, if he so wishes. However, her forfeiting of the dowry applies only to the prophet, and not to the other believers.”. He then married a 9-10-year-old.
  • Joseph Smith, Mormonism’s Prophet. When the Prophet was 37 (or possibly 25) God told him that polygyny would be a new covenant, that anyone rejecting it would be damned and that if his first wife complained about this then Christ would destroy her. Smith married at least nine teenage girls, the youngest of them aged 14.
  • David Koresh, Prophet of the Branch Davidians. Having established the Waco compound, the Prophet announced a new theology called the New Light, which prescribed polygamy for him only. He then promptly began sleeping with the 12 and 14-year-old daughters of two cult members.
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16 thoughts on “Prophets Who Conveniently Receive Divine Encouragement To Screw Kids

  1. Two possible candidates:
    Warren Jeffs
    Juliano Verbard

    Not sure whether they claimed a sudden molestation-revelation, but they at least fit the mold loosely.

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  2. The reason for the young is to catch the unblemished.
    Doesn’t mean they need have intercourse with said maiden, just means a kinda fatherly love figure.
    ‘hmm what is your motive!’
    A true king would take thee fair maiden, and, nurture her.

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  3. Are we limited to stuff descended from the Abrahamaic religions? And do the cults have to consist of a minimum number of members?
    -If you are willing to undergo ballistic vomiting, I am sure the internet can provide hundreds of examples of cults practicing pedophilia, incest, homicide and things my imagination cannot concieve.

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  4. I want prophets who a) convince people that they have a direct line to God, b) use this to sanction the screwing of kids.

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  5. Ayn Rand`s discovery that objectivism required her husband to let her bed her favourite student fits the pattern, but as far as I know she didn`t claim divine inspiration or have a kink for teenaged boys. So I am stuck. Maybe something in the Taiping rebellion, or at least the Qing propaganda against it?

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  6. The leader of the flying saucer cult who killed themselves had been a pedphile, but later had his testicles surgically removed so he may not count.
    — — — — — — — — — —
    Um, did the yogi that conned the Beatles also bonk young girls? I don’t know the details of the period, but it is the sort of things I have learned to expect. That, and collective suicide.

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  7. The Heaven’s Gate dude was simply gay and not happy about that, I think.

    I haven’t heard anything about Maharishi’s proclivities, but Sai Baba was a habitual boy molestor.

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